Building a great one-on-one management dialogue with every boss is a lot easier to accomplish in a workplace with stable and clear reporting relationships and direct lines of accountability. But as we all know, in the real world, such workplaces are rare. Some level of chaos is much more common.
Every day, I hear stories from employees who struggle to maintain stability and clarity in reporting relationships and lines of accountability. “There are just so many disruptions in that process,” said a senior production supervisor in a multimedia entertainment behemoth. After years of interviews, I have come to refer to her as ‘the Major,’ since prior to working at the multimedia company, she served for many years in the United States Army—an organization with a very tight chain of command.
“I learned in the Army from necessity that you have answer to anyone with rank,” she told me. “You also know who you are reporting to at any given time. You know who is in command. But you have to keep everybody happy: It’s one Army. We all have the same mission. We try to help each other out. So, you really answer to every soldier.”
How does the private sector differ? “It’s all the same stuff except that rank isn’t always clear and, even if it is, there isn’t an expectation that you will follow the chain of command. Plus, the mission-critical nature of the work isn’t as clear: What takes priority? People don’t necessarily agree on that.”
The Major is legendary among her colleagues as being the coolest, calmest, most professional, and most successful production supervisor in the history of the company. How does she do that? Over the years, she has developed a way to deal with these disruptions or conflicting priorities. So, I asked her to walk me through some work scenarios and how she would respond to them. What do you do when…
The Major suggests: Ask your boss, ‘Did you mean to do that?’ Then you have to ask, ‘Are you now going to manage this employee on this assignment or instruction you’ve given, or do you want me to do it? Do you want me to follow up with this employee? Would you like to make the assignment or instruction clear to me so that I can take it from here? Or are you going to take it from here? And are you taking over this employee altogether? Or do you want to share him with me?’
The Major suggests: First, ask your boss’s boss, ‘Did you mean to do that?’ Then you have to ask, ‘Do you want me to report to you on this assignment or to my boss? If I’m reporting to my boss on this, maybe the three of us should discuss it together so we all have the same understanding of the assignment. If I’m reporting directly to you on this, maybe the three of us should discuss how it affects my available time. Finally, make clear that your boss’s boss and your boss need to decide and make clear to you which of your assignments take higher priority.
The Major suggests: Don’t go over your boss’s head unless you really need to. First, decide if this is a big enough problem to threaten your relationship with your immediate boss by going to their boss. Ask yourself, ‘Is the mission of your organization in danger of failing? Will the consequences be serious? Is there a wrong being committed? Is it a pretty serious wrong? Then, if you decide you have to go over your boss’s head, your best bet is to go to a senior person you trust. Go with that senior person directly to your boss to try to resolve the problem. Hope for a resolution, or else it’s going to be a dissolution—a dissolution of your relationship with that boss and maybe with that job. You don’t want to go over your boss’s head lightly.
The Major suggests: First, figure out if you are the right and best person for the assignment. Second, determine the parameters of the assignment, such as how long it’s going to take or what are the requirements. Third, decide if you have the time and if you want the assignment. Finally, ask yourself, Is it really up to me whether to take this assignment on? Do I need to check with my boss? Do I need to check with anyone else before I take it on? Once you’ve figured all of this out, agree with the person who assigned the task on the parameters of the assignment and on how success is going to be measured.
The Major suggests: First, ask the big shot if they meant to assign the task to you. Remind them what your primary assignment is and that you mostly report to your boss. First, figure out the parameters of the assignment and whether or not it is something you are capable of doing. Third, decide if the assignment will conflict with your ability to do your primary assignment for the boss you report directly to. If it does, then discuss this conflict with the big shot who is trying to borrow or steal you away. Finally, include the boss you directly report to in a conversation about this assignment—the earlier the better.
The Major suggests: First, feed this big ego a big snack. Heap deference, thanks, and praise on that big ego. Second, figure out if this assignment is something you need to deal with or whether you can brush it off. Usually, you can be honest and explain how busy you are on your other projects. You may get the boss you report to directly to weigh in for you. But you probably won’t even need to. If you don’t have time or a desire to take on this assignment, your best bet is to respond by recommending someone else. If it’s someone calling you from out of the blue, they might as well call someone else out of the blue.
The Major suggests: Figure out right away if there is a source of authority on the rules or standards for the procedures, tasks, or responsibilities in question. If there is, then get a clear answer from that source and ideally a statement (perhaps from an instruction guide, email from the source of authority, etc.), master it, follow it, and carry it around with you to offer as your answer whenever someone tells you otherwise. If there is no source of authority, or perhaps no right or wrong way of proceeding or doing the task or responsibility in question, then figure out what rules or standards each manager follows. If one of those managers asks you to follow a rule or standard that you know for a fact to be outright wrong or bad, then you’ll need to try to teach that manager otherwise or else try to avoid working for him or her, if that’s an option.
The Major suggests: You need to be able to distinguish between your real friends and people who are just friends out of convenience. If this is a real friend, you might be willing to go out of your way for them. Before you do, perhaps you should ask, ‘Is this something you really need me to do?’ If it is not, then you might say, ‘If you were really my friend, you wouldn’t ask me to do this because I’m already way overworked.’
Improving the quality of your leadership, no matter your role, is one of the best career investments you can make: